Heihachi's Diapers
by Silverframe
Summary: The real reason why Heihachi wears diapers =)


Heihachi's Diapers  
  
by Kaze  
  
Note - There be diapers.  
  
"I don't know why, doctor." Heihachi sighed as he lay on the psychiatric couch, staring upward towards the ceiling as he talked to his psychiatrist. "Its as if every time I try to raise a child, they end up hating me for some reason." Heihachi sighed again. "I mean, why would any child I raise hate me? I'm the richest man in the world who can give them whatever they want, and I'm a master of a powerful form of martial arts! How could any child that I raise hate me?"  
  
"From what you've told me, Mr. Mishima, I wholeheartedly agree." the psychiatrist nodded as he furrowed his eyebrows and scribbled down meaningless notes onto his pad. In actuality, the psychiatrist sitting along side the rich and powerful Heihachi Mishima was not a real psychiatrist. In fact, the closest thing he had ever come in contact with psychiatry was his guidance counselor in high school who advised him to drop out because he was giving the school a bad image. But Heihachi Mishima didn't need to know that, and nor did the old man care, because he was paying this man much less than he would pay for a real psychiatrist. Stingy old bastard. "I believe that the problem is not in you, but rather in your sons and your grandson. How could a man of your generosity raise mentally disturbed children? It must be the fact that they were mentally derangd in the first place, according to the theory of nature versus nurture." He only knew about that theory because he happened to catch it in a psychology book for a brief moment before he met with Heihachi. It had sounded cool, so he thought he could use it.  
  
"I see your point, doctor." Heihachi nodded in satisfaction. His previous two psychiatrists had told him differently, that perhaps it really WAS his fault! Blasphemy! How could a man such as Heihachi Mishima do anything wrong? He was perfection, physically fit despite his age. Which he had proven to his previous two psychiatrists by sending them to the intensive care unit when they had displeased him. And just to show them how great a man he was, he had sent them to a hospital which he had a major investment in. And although he didn't pay for their extortionist medical price, Heihachi felt that he had sent them to a hospital which provided them with the best care. "Please, continue."  
  
"We know about your wife already, apparently she died when young Kazuya was borned, a sign of what sort of person he would turn out to be early in his life. Surely, a baby borned in such a way would turn out to be nothing but trouble later in life. And Lee! Lee Chaolan was a foreign peasant, picked up out of your great mercy. And like his kind, he turned out to be a greedy leech who would dare attempt to take control of an estate which your esteemed self has worked so hard to build into its current glory." the psychiatrist's reasonings were very sound and what Heihachi had been thinking of exactly, but there was a certain comfort from hearing it from a supposedly esteemed person in the observation of the human mind. "And there is your ungrateful grandon, Jin, who refused to change his last name to the glorious Mishima, instead keeping his mother's maiden name! And let us not forget that his mother and father were never married to begin with, vile! And his mother, such a strange woman! Forsaking the comforts of the modern world and taking her son to live in the forest as a hermit! Think about the consequences of that on a child's mind! But he was bad from the start anyway, being the product of such people!"  
  
"Quite right! Quite right!" Heihachi agreed wholeheartedly, the man was an absolute genius at what he did! Heihachi would make a mental note to give this man a raise within the year. "I am a man being unfairly punished by bad luck! Borned with such a naturally corrupt son, unknowingly adopt a leech. Which I will never do again, I assure you! And despite my attempt to set my son upon a path of righteousness, he instead chooses a dalliance with a strange woman! And the product of their dalliance, disastrous!"  
  
"You've hit it right on the mark, Mr. Mishima!" the psychiatrist nodded eagerly. "And I do believe that you're cured!"  
  
"But . . . I still can't help but try to sympathize and understand how my children felt. I do so wish there was some way to understand them, so I may find a way to help one in the future if need be." Heihachi sighed forlornly.  
  
"Mr. Mishima . . . I believe I have your answer!"  
  
  
-=Final Match of the Fourth King of the Iron Fist=-  
  
"Wh-what the hell?!" the fighter stared at Heihachi Mishima.  
  
"Yes . . . I understand it now, the power of youth . . . such aggression! It has been so long since I have felt such a way! And its all thanks to this . . ." Heihachi and his opponent stared down at his diaper. 


End file.
